Welcome players. The game of Chess starts you with sixteen pieces of six different types. Here we break down the six in terms of shoe-game. With nothing but love: Shoe Game Chess.

King

This is your best pair of shoes, your favorite, your top kicks. Hard to kill. You keep them protected. If your place is on fire, there you are climbing down an emergency rope ladder with these in your teeth. It’s game over if you lose the king. We don’t make the rules but this one is obvious.

Queen

Your most powerful pair. Think versatility. Footwear you can travel in, go places, do things, just as royally as the king but with more mobility. Someone that never saw your best shoes should assume these are. Queen can be your everything, certainly your almost-anything, embodying the best of the other pieces and able to offend and defend the whole shebang.

Rooks

Boots. Dress boots, thigh-highs, chukkas, wellies, some damn boots. No matter where you are, a pair of boots remain handy in your corner, deployed strategically, and for dual uses — sometimes even three. Life tells you what kind you’ll need. Spend more on less. Be ready to castle-up and keep the royal couple chambered on snowy hikes and woody worksites.

Bishops

Church shoes, job shoes. wedding shoes, court shoes, funeral shoes:  Hope mainly for one out of those five. Throw on some Bishops to slide in or out of social situations diagonally and be on guard for sharks in nice-pairs that may be scheming on your pieces from afar. Bishop and Knight are of the same material value. How one uses each depends chiefly on play-style.

Knights

Athletic footwear, sneakers, trainers. Sneaks enable you to take part in activities that regular hard-bottomed clunkers can prohibit. We don’t need a closet full of 16+ pairs (remember this isn’t checkers), but everyone deserves some well-fitting, ready-to-jump-around-in pair of sneakers to make L-shaped hops, capture the day’s goals and work that body.

Pawns

Check the breezeway. Could be old vet versions of your higher value pieces, could be slippers, flip flops or crap shoes — could be first responders. Pawns doesn’t mean you can’t make meaningful moves — even change the game. When they reach the end of the board (life) it’s an opportunity to upgrade on another one of the aboves.

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